Sunday Soliloquy: Made Free in Christ

One of my favorite songs to listen to when I'm feeling overwhelmed or sad is "You Are a Child of Mine" by Mark Schultz. If you're not familiar with it, here are the lyrics:

I've been hearing voices
Telling me that I could
Never be what I wanna be.
They're binding me with lies,
Haunting me at night,
And saying there's nothing to believe.

Somewhere in the quietness,
When I'm overcome with loneliness,
I hear You call my name.
Like a father you are near,
And as I listen I can hear You say

[Chorus]
You are a child of Mine
Born of My own design
And you bear the heart of life.
No matter where you go,
Oh, you will always know
You have been made free in Christ.
You are a child of mine. 

And so I listen as You tell me who I am
And who it is I'm gonna be.
And I hang on every word,
Knowing I have heard
I am Yours and I am free.

But when I am alone at night,
That is when I hear the lie,
'You'll never be enough.'
And though I'm giving into fear,
If I listen I can hear You say

[Chorus] 
You are a child of Mine
Born of My own design
And you bear the heart of life.
No matter where you go,
Oh, you will always know
You have been made free in Christ.
You are a child of mine.

You can listen to the whole song here.

This song has a lot of sentimental value to me. It's gotten me through a lot of tough times over the last two years, and helped me remember that God is always here for me.

Well, I had somewhat of another tough time yesterday when the day passed and I didn't get a call from the Church internship people. Despite my backup plans and confidence in God's plan, I found myself getting kind of depressed last night. I sank into a dark mood and returned to some bad habits, and I woke up this morning feeling so weak-willed and ungrateful for everything that I do have.

So I started today off right by reading the scriptures, listening to a Conference talk, and then listening to "You Are a Child of Mine." Once again it demonstrated its ability to cheer me up. But more than that, it had a deeper impact on me than usual.

You know when you re-watch or re-read something (especially the scriptures), certain things jump out at you like never before, even though you know the words by heart? The same thing happened this morning.

I was fixated on two lines:

I am Yours and I am free.
and
You have been made free in Christ.

I know I just talked about how obedience brings freedom in one of my past blog posts, but it's funny because yesterday two people separately assured me of the same thing. I was texting both my grandma and my dad, expressing worry about the internship.

Nana said, "You have done all of the right things that will open up options for yourself. Many people your age have made decisions that have closed or limited their options. In the grand, eternal scheme of things, you are way ahead of the game! Think of yourself as being ahead and not behind."

Then, a few hours later, completely unaware of my conversation with Nana, Dad said, "Disappointment is fine. Fear is not necessary. You have freedom that comes from hard work and obedience."

At the time, when he said that, I thought, "Huh. That's funny. Nana said something similar." And then I listened to that song this morning and I was like, "Wow. I'm hearing this everywhere. I guess I should pay attention."

Honestly, I don't feel like I've been doing "all the right things", and I wouldn't be surprised if I didn't get the internship simply because there were others more worthy of it. But I'm not going to delve into my problems.

I just want to say that it is a true principle we all have in our lives--Christ's Atonement paid the ultimate price for our freedom. As long as we sin and disobey, we are chained down by guilt and the consequences of our actions. But when we keep the commandments of God and do our best to improve and make good choices, we are free. We can go as far as we want in life if we listen to Him.

Some people tease and ridicule those who stick to certain principles, but look at how free they can make us (obviously these aren't guarantees, and I'm not condemning those who don't follow these principles, I'm just saying.):

* By not giving into vices like alcohol or drugs, we preserve our health, save money, and don't have addictions manipulating our actions.

* By staying chaste, we avoid unwanted pregnancy, heartbreak, and shame.

* By dressing modestly and abstaining from crude language, we earn peoples' respect and are seen in a different light.

* By being honest and law-abiding, we avoid legal limitations and people give us more freedom because they trust us.

So when you're like me and you're having a low moment in your life, just remember that God's principles make you free. Even when things don't go as planned, you can know that at least God is happy with you, and He will guide and preserve you. He loves to bless His children when we just make the choices that make us worthy of said blessings.